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I Only Have Surprise for You/Transcript
= Act 1 {The episode begins with Mac arriving home from school. He is searching for Bloo.} Mac: Bloo! Bloo!? {He finds Bloo whispering indistinctly on the telephone. As Mac approaches, he hangs up.} Bloo: Oh, hi Mac. Mac: You're never gonna believe- {He stops when he sees the wide smile on Bloo's face.} ''What? '''Bloo': What what? Mac: {suspicious} Why are you smiling like that? Bloo: Am I smiling? I didn't even notice. I guess I'm happy! Mac: Happy about what? Bloo: You know, stuff. {He walks away, giggling as he does. Mac stops him.} Mac: What stuff? Bloo: Never you mind. {changing the subject} You have something to show me? {Mac stares at him a bit, before shrugging it off} Mac: {presenting a flyer} I saw this flyer for a pie eating contest and the priz- {He's cut off by Bloo giggling again. Bloo walks off again.} '''What!?' '''Bloo': Sorry, I'm just thinking about something else. Mac: {realizes something and gasps} ''You're doing it again, are you!? Today's the day! '''Bloo': Mac, I honestly have no idea what you're talking about. {One Eye Cy appears next to Bloo.} One Eye Cy: Hey, boss. I almost got that- {he then notices Mac's presence; to Bloo} -''project finished for ya. ''{runs off} Bloo: Thanks, Cy. {Mac stares at him.} Bloo: He's making some new curtains. You know, to hang on the wall. I mean windows! {The duo walk into another room as Bloo continues to giggle.} Mac: {angry} Ugh, Bloo! Bloo: What? Come on Mac. Curtains! {giggles} {Bloo twirls and sings; he then hops on to the couch and begins to play with his paddleball.} Mac: How stupid do you think I am!? I know what you're doing and it's not gonna happen! No way! I'm sticking to you like glue! Bloo: {scoffs} Whatever you say Mac. Mac: {hopping up to Bloo} ''Yep, I'm not letting you out of my sight! You didn't see '''this' coming, did you? {laughs} I bet inside you're all freakin' out! {suddenly begins to worry} ''Unless...you '''did' see this coming. {gasp} You did see this coming! This is exactly what you wanted me to do! This is all part of your plan! I'm not sticking to you at all! {goes to leave the room} ''No way! ''{he then goes upstairs} Mac: He thinks he can trick me? He can't trick me! I'm the one that'll trick him! Unless he wants me to trick him and that's part of the trick. {at the top, he runs into Big Fat Baby} Big Fat Baby: Hey Mac. Mac: {paranoid} Why'd you say that!? Did Bloo tell you to say that!? ANSWER ME!! {Big Fat Baby begins to cry} Mac: I-I'm sorry! {panicking} I can't leave him like this! There's gotta be something that'll stop him! {He goes to Mr. Herriman's office to search for something to stop Baby's crying. A confused Herriman observes.} Mr. Herriman: Master Mac. Mac: Shhh! {continues searching} Mr. Herriman: Ugh, for the last time, there are no devices for a sobbing baby in this office. Now, what's your problem? Mac: {whispering in Herriman's ear} Bloo's throwing me a surprise party. Mr. Herriman: A PARTY!? Mac: SHHHHH!! Mr. Herriman: I had no idea whatsoever that it is your birthday. Now, we must gather all and sing the birthday song. {picks up the phone and starts singing into it} Today, today, today is your birthday! Mac: It's not my birthday. And Bloo never throws me a surprise party on my birthday because that way it'll be a bigger surprise. My birthday is the only day I'm safe...except one year where he threw me a birthday 'cause he knew I thought I was safe. So basically, I'm never safe! {pleading} ''The point is you have to stop him! '''Mr. Herriman': But why would you not want celebratory festiveness? This wouldn't have anything to do with sugar, would it? Mac: No, this is a completely different hang up I have. Every time Bloo throws a party, he totally humiliates me! {Flashback to three previous surprise parties thrown by Bloo; first, Mac is seen in the shower, cleaning up. When he finishes, the shower curtains fly open revealing Bloo and his entire class there, shocking him.} Bloo and The Class: Surprise! {Secondly, Mac is eating a burger and pours what he thinks is ketchup on it. Shortly after taking a bite, his face turns red and he breathes fire; the label falls off revealing it is actually hot sauce. He attempts to extinguish the hotness with some tap water, but finds that the sink isn't working. He checks the fridge for milk, but it turns out to be empty. He then goes over to the dog bowl and licks up the water, before finding his friends, Bloo, Terrance, and even his mother in front of him.} Everyone (minus Mac): Surprise! {Lastly, Mac is again showering, this time uninterrupted. He then tries to find his towel, only to feel something different and gives an annoyed expression. He walks out of the house in ballerina attire.} Mac: Bloo! Where's my towel!? {the guests appear once more} Everyone (minus Mac): Surprise! {back in reality} Mac: {to camera} I really should've seen that last one coming. {to Herriman} Now, do you understand why I hate parties? Mr. Herriman: Indeed I do. Don't worry Master Mac, you shall not be exposed to one under my watch. Mac: {hugging Herriman} Thanks! You don't know how much this means to me. Mr. Herriman: {patting Mac's head} ''Er, yes, yes yes, uh, quite informal. There there, there we are. ''{looks around, before looking unamused} We're still doing this I see. {back with Bloo; he's now reading a book, when Mac comes in} Mac: You lose Bloo! I just talked to Mr. Herriman and there's no party! You hear me? Herriman totally took my side and he's not gonna let you throw anything! {laughs} Didn't count on me going to him, did ya?! {becomes worried again} Unless you did count on me going to him. {shrugs it off} Pfft, yeah right. {stops, then retracts this statement} ''It is right! You went to him first, which is why he agreed to help me, because he's really helping you! Who else is in on this?! ''{Eduardo and Coco enter the room} Eduardo: ¡Hola! señor Mac! Coco: {squawking} Mac: You! Are you working for Bloo!? Eduardo: No. {goes over to Bloo} Señor Bloo, you are starting a company? You know I have valuable potential. Coco: {squawking} Mac: Don't give me that! You know exactly what I'm talking about! You're both traitors! Eduardo: {ecstatic} It is a training company? I can be quite great for training. I train what you give me, and when I get something, I train for you. Bloo: {jumping up} Mac. Nobody's working for me. Eduardo: {upset} I'm fired? You can't fire me, I quit! {runs off crying} Bloo: There is no party, and nothing's going on. {he begins to giggle again} Mac: THEN WHY ARE YOU GIGGLING!? Bloo: My curtains. They're going to match everything. Mac: You can hide behind your curtains all you want, but there's a party here and I'm going to find it! {storms off} Coco: {squawking, ab-libing the cuckoo noise} Bloo: Tell me about it. {in the upstairs hall, Mac continues his search for the party} Mac: There's gotta be evidence somewhere. What do you need for a party? People! He's got people here. Food! Like a cake! You need a birthday cake! {He makes his way to the kitchen. There, Frankie is seen attempting to bake one, when Mac bursts in.} Mac: A-HA! Frankie: {frustrated} Oh, great, everything's spoiled. Mac: You bet it is! Frankie: {noticing Mac coming in} ''Mac? You left the refrigerator door open? '''Mac': Huh? Frankie: Ugh, it was open all night, and now I have to throw out the milk, eggs, and butters, {takes out two bowls containing frozen batter} plus everything in these two bowls! Mac: You're not baking a cake? Frankie: No. Why, do you want one? Mac: No, so don't get any big ideas, sister! {dashes out} ''Alright, there's no cake, even though you need cake for a birthday, so they just need people and...{sees Madame Foster running upstairs with bags}'' PRESENTS!! {He goes up to her and snatches the bags from her.} Madame Foster: Wh-what in the daisies!? Mac: Game's up, grandma! Madame Foster: Oh, no. Please dearie, don't look inside! Mac: Why not? Afraid I'm going to see all the {takes each item out} skin cream, dental cleaner, some wool hose, {realizes} and brand new panties? {sees Madame Foster glaring it him} Uh, I see why you might want to..umm..keep this private. {Madame Foster whips out her cane and beats Mac with it} Madame Foster: Scram, you tufty little hooligan! {Mac runs down the stairs} ''Touching an old woman's unmentionables even when she's going down to have a pitch! '''Mac': Okay, no presents, except people bringing their own presents. I'm sure they'll bring them over to the...{he peaks into the dining room, where he sees Wilt hanging up a banner}….A-HA!! ''Wilt, stop! ''{he tackles Wilt} Wilt: Whoa! Mac: You can't throw me a...{looks at the banner}...Earth day? Wilt: Yeah. I was just taking down these decorations, but, you know you're right Mac. We should leave 'em up. Because every day should be Earth day! I'm gonna find some stuff to recycle! {walks off} {shortly thereafter, Mac sits at the staircase, thinking about what's going on} Mac: So there's no cake, there weren't any decorations, it could be Earth day I guess. Maybe Bloo isn't throwing me a party. Bloo: {walking by} ''Party? Are you still on that? ''{the doorbell rings} ''I got it! ''{at the door is a clown named Bongo} Mac: A-HA! I got you! There is a party! Why else would there be a clown here? Bloo: He's not here for that. He's here for uh...uh...{to Bongo} why are you here? Bongo: I'm an imaginary friend! Bloo: Exactly. He's in need of a good home. Mac: Please. You're trying to tell me some kid imagined this? {Bongo looks surprised} He's pathetic! Look at that ratty hair, faded nose, dumb hands and shirt. We don't want you here! Daniel: {entering} What do you think of Foster's Bongo? Bongo: I hate it Daniel! {runs away, tears in his eyes} Daniel: I thought you're supposed to be friends. {leaves} Mac: That? Bloo: He really was an imaginary friend. One Eye Cy: Here's your curtains boss. {hands them to Bloo} Bloo: {feeling them} Thanks, Cy. They're perfect. Mac: You're not throwing me a party, are you? Bloo: That's what I've been trying to tell you. {the doorbell rings again} Mac: Oh, good, they're back! {opens door} I'm so sorr-Goo? What are you doing here? Goo: Duh, I'm here for the party! {she holds out a present, Mac giving a look of horror as she does} Act 2 Mac: So there IS a party! Goo: Uh-huh, I said there is one. Why'd would I be here if there weren't one? {she begins to ramble incoherently as usual} Heh, please, ice cream, why would I want that, BLEAH!!! {Bloo, to keep their cover, silently warns Goo about what she did.} Goo: I mean, I mean, this isn't a party. Mac: But you just said there was one. Goo: No, no, I said I came down to see Artie. {points forward} ''There he is! '''Artie': Hi Goo. Goo: I created him. {Artie approaches them} Artie: I'm Artie! I'm four years old! Goo: {giggle} They grow up so fast. Mac: If you're here to see Artie, why do you have a present? Artie: {gasp} You have a present, Goo! Bloo: That-that's not a present! Goo: This? No, no. {giggling and snorting} This is, this is, this is my lunch! I wrapped it up because it's perfect. I'm gonna go put it in the fridge, bye! {runs off} Artie: Hi mailman! {runs out of the house} I'm four years old! Mac: {to Bloo} If you think I'm gonna walk right into your trap, well I'm one step ahead of you this time! I'm leaving! {goes outside} Artie: I'm four years old. {cut to Herriman's office where everybody is gathered; they've just been informed that Mac has left} Everyone (minus Bloo and Goo): HE KNOWS OF THE PARTY!? Goo: I didn't know what to say. He was there and I said "uhuhuhuhuh" and when I had my lunch in the present out I was like "uhuhuhuhuh" and he leaved like it was the worst thing ever! Frankie: I don't know Goo. You're so weird, I can see you wrapping your lunch like a present. Goo: Why didn't he? Bloo: Kids these days. Who knows why they do anything, it's crazy! Wilt: I'm sorry, but what if he's not back in time for the party? Bloo: Don't worry. I'll get him back. Mr. Herriman: Very well, Master Blooregard. It'll be your charge to retrieve him in due time. In the interim, you all have your sites, but there will be no more mishaps and our guest of honor will be surprised indeed. Now, let's get this party started! {the camera pans to the ceiling, revealing Mac to be eavesdropping on them out of view} Mac: I knew it! They were working for Bloo like they do every year! He's going to humiliate me all over again. No, I won't let him! I will not give into fear any longer! They want a surprise, I'll give them a surprise. {Mac dons a Rambo-like outfit; he then does some exercises} Mac: It's party time! {realizing what he just said} Or...not party time. Un-party time? Yeah. It's un-party time! {In the kitchen, Frankie attempts to bake another cake while Bloo observes.} Frankie: Bloo, get your hands out of there! Bloo: But I want cake! Frankie: Later! {As Frankie escorts Bloo away, Mac, hiding in a cupboard, watches in secret.} Mac: I think you're missing one ingredient Frankie. It's last but not yeast! {He gets a box of yeast out and laughs manically. He then sneaks to the ceiling, drops from a secret compartment with some rope, and dumps the yeast into the mix. After he goes into hiding, Frankie places the cake into the oven. As soon as she does, the oven begins to rumble.} Frankie: That's strange. {the now large cake mix spreads out of the oven, trapping her} ''Wauugh!! Ugh, ugh! '''Mac': {escaping} ''There's your cake and you can eat it too! ''{laughs} Bloo: {coming back} Is it later yet? {he sees the ruined cake batter} MAC!! {in the dining room, Wilt and Eduardo are busy putting up balloons and streamers} Eduardo: {exhausted} Oh, these balloons, they take my breath away. Wilt: Keep at it Ed! You're doing a great job! {Mac comes by and starts throwing pins at the balloons, scaring Eduardo.} Eduardo: A bomb! There is a bomb in the house! Wilt: That's not a bomb. You just stepped on the balloons. Eduardo: I did? {he slowly lowers a foot down, before Mac pops more balloons, making him jump more} Wilt: {annoyed} Hey, I'm sorry, but you gotta be more careful! Eduardo: But I don't pop them! Wait a momento! {pointing to Wilt} You popped to balloons! Wilt: What? {Eduardo tears the streamers down} Hey, cut that out please? {They are hit by party hats shot by Mac, hiding behind one of the tables.} Eduardo: Señor Mac? {Mac starts shooting more, until Bloo enters} Bloo: NO! {Mac quickly escapes, while Bloo tries to find him} Mac? Mac?! {Mac's shadow passes by, making Bloo stop} ''Mac, is that you? ''{he hears him laughing} Come on out buddy. There's an easy explanation for all of this. {He sees Mac's sneakers at the foot of a large curtain} ''There's no reason to HIDE! ''{He unravels the curtain; Mac isn't there. Bloo then sees that he's standing on a net trap, which activates and catches him. He sees Mac laughing at him.} ''You set booby traps!? '''Mac': You'll never stop me Bloo! NO ONE WILL!! {runs off; Bloo sees Scissors appear} Bloo: Hey, Scissors! Over here, HELP! Scissors: Don't worry Bloo. I'll get something to cut ya down! {runs away, to Bloo's aggravation} {Meanwhile, Goo and Coco are wrapping up gifts. Bloo, having somehow escaped, bursts in to warn them of Mac.} Bloo: Mac? Has he been in here? Coco: {squawking} Bloo: I'll check the halls. If you hear anything, ANYTHING, you yell. Okay? {leaves} Goo: Whatever. Goodbye! {they get back to work, when they start hearing a thumping noise. Suddenly, Mac bursts out of the gift with some tape in his hands. Goo and Coco scream.} {In the halls, Bloo keeps searching for Mac, until he hears the now muffled screams of the girls. He rushes back to see that Mac has tied them up gagged with presents. He sneaks up behind Mac pointing a toy gun at him.} Bloo: Put the tape down Mac. Mac: Please, like that would hurt. {gets shot at; the retractable bullet sticks to him} Ow! {Bloo pulls it off} OWW! That really hurt! Bloo: I said drop it! Mac: {drops the tape; seemingly in regret} I'm sorry. I just couldn't face another party. I knew you weren't gonna stop so I had to stop it! I had to! {eyes watering} I didn't mean to hurt anyone. Bloo: Come here. {They share a hug. However, Mac now has the tape attached to his back, intending to trap Bloo again. Coco and Goo try to warn him of this.} ''Oh, stop. Two boys can hug. '''Mac': {taping Bloo} Gotcha! {he places the retractable bullet on Bloo's mouth} ''Who's embarrassed now, Bloo? The cake, the decorations, and the presents are all ruined. You will never throw me a party again! You've humiliated me for the last time! ''{crushes a gift box} ''You know why, Bloo? Because the party is over! And I win, finally, I win! ''{swings out laughing} Act 3 {in his office, Mr. Herriman is busy at the typewriter when the other party planners come in} Mr. Herriman: WHAT HAPPENED? Frankie: Mac ruined my cake. Eduardo: He ruined our decorating too. Wilt: Technically, we ruined most of it. Sorry. {Coco, Goo, and Bloo hop in, still gagged} Mr. Herriman: Is there anything you could salvage whatsoever? {everyone shakes their heads no} That does it then. Master Mac has completely ruined the party! Mac: {spying on them} That's right! Mr. Herriman: What about you, B-Team? {Mac looks back inside and sees a trio of imaginary friends before Herriman.} B-Team Leader: No problems at all. Cake's done, presents wrapped, decorations done, it is fantastic! {shakes hands with Herriman} Frankie: Great job guys! {Bloo, Coco, and Goo free themselves} Coco: {squawking} Mr. Herriman: And do credit to you Master Blooregard, for anticipating in every one of Mac's ruses. {removes the bullet from his mouth} Bloo: When you got it, you got it. Mr. Herriman: Indeed. Now, if we so kindly retrieve the guest of honor, we'll rush on down to the library for the real festive. Mac: Library! {he dashes to the library; when he gets there, he gasps at what he sees, before giving an evil grin.} {At the other entrance, almost every member of the house is preparing to enter. Frankie is doing a head count of everyone.} Frankie: They're all here Mr. H. Mr. Herriman: Excellent. Now, once inside, everyone find a hiding spot. {He opens the doors, and everyone is shocked at what they see: the party is completely ruined. On the table is an insane Mac causing destruction.} Mac: SURPRISE!! ''{laughs insanely}'' Eduardo: Señor Mac has gone crazy! Coco: {shocked squawking} Mac: I told you not to throw me a party! Every year I tell him no more parties! But does he listen? NEVER EVER EVER EVER!! But he'll listen now! {laughs} Frankie: Mac, this party isn't for you. Bloo: {with Artie in tow} Surpri-ohhhh! What the heck happened here? {Mac looks around the library, seeing that everything is themed after Artie.} Mac: I didn't... Artie: {heartbroken} I'm four years old. {runs away crying} Mac: I thought this was my party. {to Goo} You said you ruined the surprise. Goo: I didn't. Artie saw me walking with the present I had for him. Mac: But I left. Bloo: Artie left too, remember? He walked out the door? One Eye Cy: And I didn't want to tell him about the curtains 'cause then everyone would know I can sew. Elderly Imaginary Friend: You can? I sure can use some pants! Mr. Herriman: Master Mac, when you told me you hate parties, my chief concern was protecting this one from you. But I see now no party is safe from the likes of you. You will destroy each and every one, even if that means destroying lives in the process. Mac: But... {He leaves; Mac attempts to stop him, but retracts. Everyone else starts to leave too.} Eduardo: You are really mean, you know? Coco: {angry squawking} Wilt: Maybe next time, you should talk about your problems, instead of taking them out on a little imaginary friend! Frankie: Like I didn't have enough to clean! Goo: You stink! Bloo: How could you Mac? He was four years old today! Four...years...old! Mac: But it was for me. Bloo: How many times do I have to say it? I'm NOT throwing you a party! Mac: Don't you think when you said that you could of mentioned there was also a totally different party going on? Bloo: {thinks about it} Alright, maybe I could've made that a teensy bit clearer. Mac: Now the whole house hates me. And Artie...I have to make it up to him. I-I can get him a toy. Bloo: Yeah, that toy to turn back time so he can have his fourth birthday again! Mac: What if I throw him another party? A bigger and better one. It'll be a surprise. You know what he likes so you can help me decorate. I'll get a cake and toys. Please Bloo? It would mean the world to him...and me! Bloo: Eh, alright, I'll do it, for Artie....and five bucks. {Mac gives him the money} I mean ten. {another bill is given} Do you have any new bills? Mac: BLOO!! Bloo: Okay, okay. We'll stop at the bank. {In a montage, the duo get to work making a new cake, setting up new decorations, wrapping new gifts, and getting the rest of Bloo's money at the bank. After....} Bloo: {referring to the money} Amazing! These come all the way from San Francisco! {sees Mac glaring at him} The party's okay too. Mac: {taking out a map} So for games, I blacked out the names of countries on my world map, and wrote them on pieces of paper- Bloo: But Mac, those are boring things you like. This is Artie's party, and if you wanna make him real happy...{the rest is whispered in Mac's ear indistinctly} Mac: {terrified} ''No, no no, I won't, I can't, I hate them! '''Bloo': Well, I guess you also don't love making little imaginary friend's dreams come true. Mac: {defeated; furious} Fine, I'll do it. {Bloo then goes all over the house calling for everyone} Bloo: HOUSE MEETING!! EVERYBODY DOWNSTAIRS NOW! {walks into the nursery, waking the babies} WAKE UP! HOUSE MEETING! WAKE UP! {he runs into Eduardo drinking juice} ''House meeting downstairs. '''Eduardo': But I'm not finished my juice box. {Bloo simply takes the juice box and slurps it down to emptiness} ''Gracias! ''{Meanwhile, Rock, Paper, and Scissors are attempting to play} All: One, two, three, spin! Rock: Yes, I win! Paper: No, I cover you. Scissors: But I cut you. Bloo: HOUSE MEETING EVERYBODY! DOWNSTAIRS!! {back at the library} Mr. Herriman: Master Blooregard, haven't we been through enough for one day? Bloo: Not yet. Artie: Bloo, you have asked me for something? {Bloo opens the doors and everyone gushes at the sight in front of them} Bloo: Surprise! Artie: {overjoyed} You did all of this for me? Bloo: Nope! {Mac, dressed as a clown, appears on top of the cake} Mac: It was me, Macco the Clown. I'm here to give you the most flip flippty fantastic party ever! Whoops! {falls from the cake; everyone laughs at him} ''How about a drink of water? ''{sprays himself with a spritzer bottle; more laughter} ''It's time to sit down! ''{spins around before landing on a whoopee cushion} ''Excuse me! Golly, Artie! What do you think? '''Artie': I have only one thing to say. {Turns out, "Artie" is actually Madame Foster in disguise; she rips the costume off} Everyone (minus Mac): SURPRISE!! {laughter} {Everyone leaves. One Eye Cy pats Mac on the head} Mac: {stunned} ''You planned this party all along. '''Bloo': Uh huh. Mac: Knowing that I'd destroy them both, and make myself feel bad, I throw my own my own surprise party and completely humiliate myself. Bloo: Uh huh. Mac: And everyone in the house was in on it. Bloo: Everyone except Ed. Eduardo: I just did what the invitations told me to do. Bloo: Face it Mac. I'll always be one step ahead of you. Mac: Oh yeah? {Mac charges for Bloo. The latter dodges, causing Mac to crash into the table and overturn the cake onto himself. Everyone laughs at him.} Mr. Herriman: Oh, Master Mac. You are indeed a party animal. Bloo: {sadistically} One step ahead. Credits Scene Eduardo: Senor Artie! Where are you, Senor Artie? Madame foster, I want introduce Senor Artie to the new clown friend. We love him. Madame Foster: Oh, Ed. Here, darling, there's something you should know. Eduardo: Senor Artie! He es missing his skin! Bongo: What is wrong with you, people? This isn't Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends, it's Foster's Home for Crazy People! Category:Episode transcripts